toots-toots:

Am I the only one who keeps their phone on silent 99.3 % of the time

(via wood-elves)

actionables:

When your song comes on the radio and you’re just like

image

(Source: cynicolerichie, via luckydreaming)


Anonymous asked: You're a qt pie

Thank you~~~~~


0 notes

hiansondaan101981 asked: Aww you guys are so cute :") how longs it been now?

Ummm its been since about novemberish so about 5-6 months (: But we have known each other for like 7 lol.


1 note

evaded:

If I text you first, you better appreciate that shit because I don’t do it for just anyone.

(via nottheaveragetaco)

670
gay-teen-posts:

kiss me like you want to be loved ♡

jaclcfrost:

you could take me on a date anywhere and i’d be happy. like it could be the movie theater. or watching a movie at your house. fuck you could take me outside and we could look at clouds or climb trees i do not care as long as we hold hands or something at some point

(via a-heart-that-never-dies)

17
Hello Tumblr.
Actual Quotes from my Dad (An English Teacher)
  • Dad: Why the hell did you put a comma there?
  • Dad: Do you even know what a participial phrase is?
  • Dad: Omg. He's like my favorite character of all time.
  • Dad: Who should I dress up as for the movie premier?
  • Dad: Hey are you awak? I know it's late, but you read Animal Farm, right? Yeah. I need you to read this report. I can't tell if I am just super tired or if this is actual bullshit.
  • Dad: Alesha wouldn't be able to spell 'definitely' right if wrote it down for her. She would fucking erase it and then write 'defiantly', because she doesn't care. I hate her.
  • Dad: I need you to bake brownies. I lost a bet.
  • Dad: Omg. You cannot ship me with Gilcher. You know I don't like tattoos and he's like twenty-five. And for Christ's sake, he teaches math.
  • Dad: Omg. Gilcher said the funniest thing today.
  • Dad: Mrs. Ashworth and I have decided to start a band. It'll be called Great Expectations.
  • Dad: It's like you didn't read the fucking book.
  • Dad: Okay. So this week you're reading this book I stole from Mrs. Ashworth's. It's like sixty pages long, but you'll love it.
  • Dad: *puts books on my bed for me to read everyday and demands that I read them*
  • Dad: My son doesn't like reading. I have not only failed him, but society. You aren't my son. Leave.
  • Dad: Okay. So you're getting books for Christmas. All of you. I get discounts on them since I'm a teacher, and since I'm a teacher, it's all I can afford, so...
  • Dad: Fucking standardized testing can go fuck itself in the ass.
  • Dad: I have to teach for the required testing instead of what they really need to know.
  • Dad: Fuck the government.
  • Dad: Fuck the school board.
  • Dad: Close the door.
  • Dad: Charles Dickens was so fucking pretentious, and I hate him, but he also caused change, but he's such a Dick. Ha. DICKens.
  • Dad: I love puns.
  • Dad: People who say sarcasm is the lowest form of humor are assholes.
  • Dad: Please shut up.
  • Dad: Catching Fire was the worst book but the best movie and that feels weird.
  • Dad: I wouldn't get so mad when you call me at school if you didn't change your ringtones to inappropriate rap music.
  • Dad: I fucking hate Alesha. She asked what countries were apart of Austria-Hungary today and I almost told her to get out.
  • Dad: You cannot visit my school in a dress that short. There are boys there.
  • Dad: Barbra Parks is fucking Queen.
  • Dad: I need you to make me a good, relaxing playlist for silent reading. I'm too lazy.
  • Dad: If I have to watch two of my students grind on each other at one more dance, I will kill them both.
  • Dad: They act like I care what they think.
  • Dad: I hate homework.
  • Dad: I have decided to become a politician.
  • Dad: What's the one book with the guys and the one kills the other and the chick without a name who dies and the short angry man? Mouseman? Oh my fucking gosh. Of Mice and Men. I have failed.

i hope you fall in love with someone who makes you question why you ever thought you would be better off alone

(Source: lalondes, via astral-wish)

applevevo:

listening to a sad song that has a nice beat

image

(via i-am-your-stag)

sorry:

I read an article the other day that said, “if you drink every day you are an alcoholic.” Thank god I only drink every night

(Source: sorry, via luckydreaming)

  • at the start of the semester: i'm gonna get a 4.0 gpa
  • at the end of the semester: perfection is the disease of a nation...pretty hurts, pretty hurts
  • gay kid: hey i like your shoes
  • straight boy: haha thanks but im straight